The universe is spinning and throwing my mind, my body, my hopes, my dreams into warp speed. I am not sure where it is taking me, but if I was an astrologist, I would say I believe that the stars are beginning to align for me. I am at a place in my life where I am taking the reigns back and putting myself out there in my relationships, in the dating world, in my acting, in my writing. I am tired of resting on my laurels and staying comfortable. I can't even believe I am quoting Black Eyed Peas, by saying "I gotta feeling....that tonight's gonna be a good night," but I am- in the perspective of this year. For years I have said, "Oh no, I won't get in a relationship until I am settled in my career," but the energy fields are spinning and pushing everything into one nuclear reaction throwing all into orbit at once. In the midst of the chaos of the unknown I am living in, the only source of peace in that nucleus is the joy that I receive in Christ. I choose to trust the promises of the Lord and lay it all out there and give it all back, releasing control. I choose to float into the atmosphere and let it have its' way with me, trusting full well that it will land me on the mountaintop I have dreamed of for so long.
This entire commitment to let go is inspired by the need to refuse to settle. I will not settle in my pursuit for the woman the Lord has set out for me. I will not settle into the isolation of my apartment thus preventing myself from being able to find that one. I will not settle for the status quo when it comes to my diligence in the pursuit of acting. I will not settle for unearned loyalty. I will not settle with the excuses of a weak demo reel, nor inexperience. I choose to take charge and pursue excellence in this pursuit. I will not settle for mediocrity in my writing and therefore, choose to stir the pot to create a masterpiece. I choose to make myself available for love, no matter the fear of being hurt, or being forced to be vulnerable. I choose to commit my ways to the Lord and in all my ways acknowledge Him. I choose to make a difference each day in the lives of the people I interact with. I choose to live for each day, one day at a time, trusting that the sum of my days will add up to the Lord saying to me, "Well done, my good and faithful servant." I just gotta a feeling......
1 comment:
Aw YAY Reid! I got a similar feeling that started the end of 2007 (my engagement time), and life's been spinning and shaking ever since. I'm scared, excited, and over-joyed at all Christ has done, and is still doing in my now "married life". It has been one extreme roller coaster ride. I don't think I ever want this ride to end ;).
With that said. When you get some free time, come see us in Aliso Viejo, it's time to hang out again (other than for Ms. Jolly's NorthEaster class) ;).
Blessings and Prayers for you!
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